Thanks

Blake Williams died on Saturday, March 22, 2008 in Iraq. I met him once before in December of 2006 in Richmond, VA at a Pat McGee Band concert. The concert was a celebration of the life of Blake's brother Chris. Now both are gone, leaving behind numerous friends and family members to sort through the missing pieces in their lives due to the loss of these two brothers. Chris Williams was my very good friend and, like everyone who knew him, I miss him, but it's no longer time to be caught up in sadness over this tragedy. When we look at our lives and see others lose theirs, we have to be very sure to take the focus off of their passing. Mourning and grief is absolutely necessary and I would never presume to denounce its necessity and over-powering weight that will bend even the most callous knee. The troubles ease, the memory lingers but relents its grip somewhat. Life cannot stop, no it will not. When I think of Chris, my heart no longer aches, instead I smile and remember the things he did for me, the amazing music he played, and his genuine, humble and generous spirit. Thanks! My ex-father-in-law passed away this past Christmas. I was sitting in an airport, somewhere in Texas I think, when I got the call. Here was a man that lived a hard life, a man that passed that hardship onto those around him. He lived by a different code than anyone I've ever met. His ideals rested in self-sufficiency, self-confidence, self-denial and rugged unrelenting principles. He was the leader of his family and in the mid-seventies he had moved from Maine to Idaho with an entourage of family members. They ended up buying land at the end of a barely passable logging road not far from Bonners Ferry, ID. There he forged a life by clearing the land, building homes, hunting for game, constantly up keeping the 6 mile long driveway and working as freelance carpenter. When I became a part of his family, there was little use for a person like me in his world. Unfortunately I found myself discriminated against in subtle ways and hushed voices around their household. A fact that slowly but surely made itself known to me. No amount of work ethic or responsibility within myself seemed to make a dent on how I was viewed as a outside nuisance that came from the vile world. And here I was married to one of his six children. A daughter that had already rebelled heavily against him in the past. Fortunately they had something of a patched over relationship that improved over the passing years. In the end, it was this unrelenting spirit that caused his fall. Too many years of working too hard, his body failed him. At the young age of 56, the tissue resembled that of a man in his late 80's and there was simply nothing to keep his heart going further. So what to make of this? This person made my life difficult, and made it hard to be comfortable around him. The thing is, I still appreciate knowing him. I was sad when he passed. I felt deeply for his family, for my son who lost his grandfather. For my ex who lost her father. The pain for all of them is still fresh and just now beginning to ease the slightest. I know that my judgement of him never wished for a tragedy like this to occur, and really, no judgement on my part is necessary or warranted. People die. It's one of the hardest events that the living must endure. I could speak about the injustice of Blake dying a million miles away from his family in a war that is indefensible. I could say that it is a senseless tragedy that Chris died so young. I could rant about John's passing and the unfinished business left behind in it's wake. What I would rather say is that the world and life has been full because of these people and I thank them for what they contributed to my experience, be it small or large, good or bad - so thank you, thank you very much! I hope the pain passes soon and is replaced with joy for everyone. Life is here today, yes it is.