The speed of it

I'm being rushed off into my new reality and it's brilliant...really it is. Time is flowing so fast and I'm just running to catch up with the potential I am being allowed. It's a good thing. Leaving those hard days behind for now. They had their place, but a new day is in full swing and it's full of contentment, fullfillment and a restful comfort. Just beautiful.

Just a little down

There it is again. I've been so preoccupied with a million tasks lately that I haven't taken so much as a breath. When I did, I felt good, solid, but tired. And yet today, I felt a dip in my positive climb. I'm being manipulated, told half-truths and they make me feel like I can't get where I'm going...but really, they are just hurdles, the kind we all face. There is so much good happening too and so I will weather this storm, it can't rain everyday. Some recent love leaves as easy as it came, I am not troubled, but I feel it's loss. I did not depend on it's crutch, but it made the days pass easier. I tell myself to relax and enjoy this day. To remember that this trouble will pass. To look forward and not behind. This brightness coming around the bend is too bright to ignore. The discouraging voices are desperate and distant, I only pay them mind when I'm absent minded...and so I will be turning this ship back around. I want to see what's coming up. Yes, take me there.

If you believe in redemption...

Powerless as we may be, life is not without its natural rythms and balance. The redemption about me now is undeniable. Deep and thurough. And I am not the one responsible, it was no act of my own. I simply work and keep my head up, eyes on the horizon. The season of hardship passes, the years of struggle fade like the night into morning and again, I'm sure the sun is rising...no illusion, real sunlight this time. I become one. Thankful. What a life.

Nowhere to go

I just learned of another musical kindred who passed away. Walt Redmond was a fixture in the Hampton Roads music scene. I can't help but feel angry and sad. It wells a feeling that I cannot abide. The one where you are absolutely powerless. There's nowhere to go, no amount of honest effort that can change this situation. I had to call a friend and share the sad news, she knew him as well. I can't help but feel like I said all the wrong things...but I know there's no way to say those things the right way. You do your best. I am swept away to the time when I lost my friend Chris. Deep breath. Take some time. It is a part of life and I won't deny it. I will miss seeing him play his songs and I wish his family and friends comfort.

Blake's got a new face.

Change. Change. Change. We are all growing and changing. How about this: I recently caught up with a friend I have not seen in quite a while. And she seems so very different now. We reconnect, but in a new way, on a new day. Both of us changed. Like two strangers who are very comfortable with each other, who perhaps understood each other, but now we begin to understand each other. Still learning who you are, you look at little lost...and a little wiser. Present tense. Makes much more sense.

Hallmark

They don't make a Hallmark card for this...that's all I could come up with. I'm still alone, but I can't say I've been all by myself. Strange, sweet, dramatic days. Transition. Waiting for the real deal to come along. Won't you come along?

Friends in need

I love my friends. They are the best and they make this life truly wonderful. I am truly blessed. I have had many days where I've been down and out, they come and pick me up, carry me through and walk beside me. Now my turn has come to be the crutch. To remind them of the sunshine and the promise of better times. I hope I can find the right words, take the right action, whisper the right prayers and serve them as well as they have served me. It's a most delicate balance of keeping self righteousness at bay, but being in confident in love and redemption. One must keep the slate clean and be ever vigiliant. I must put them first, before myself. I must remove any motivation if I am to be any real help. I must keep reminding myself of this, I must keep reminding myself of this, I must keep reminding myself of this.